Six Nations – A Call to Arms

With another big Six Nations weekend on the horizon, I challenge you to read this poem and not feel motivated to cheer on your nation with that extra decibel of gusto.

When the battle scars have faded
And the truth becomes a lie
And the weekend smell of liniment
Could almost make you cry.

When the last ruck’s well behind you
And the man that ran now walks
It doesn’t matter who you are
The mirror sometimes talks

Have a good hard look old son!
The melon’s not that great
The snoz that takes a sharp turn sideways
Used to be dead straight

You’re an advert for arthritis
You’re a thoroughbred gone lame
Then you ask yourself the question
Why the hell you played the game?

Was there logic in the head knocks?
In the corks and in the cuts?
Did common sense get pushed aside?
By manliness and guts?

Do you sometimes sit and wonder
Why your time would often pass
In a tangled mess of bodies
With your head up someone’s arse?

With a thumb hooked up your nostril
Scratching gently on your brain
And an overgrown Neanderthal
Rejoicing in your pain!

Mate – you must recall the jersey
That was shredded into rags
Then the soothing sting of Dettol
On a back engraved with tags!

It’s almost worth admitting
Though with some degree of shame
That your wife was right in asking
Why the hell you played the game?

Why you’d always rock home legless
Like a cow on roller skates
After drinking at the clubhouse
With your low down drunken mates

Then you’d wake up – check your wallet
Not a solitary coin
Drink Berocca by the bucket
Throw an ice pack on your groin

Copping Sunday morning sermons
About boozers being losers
While you limped like Quazimoto
With a half a thousand bruises!

Yes – an urge to hug the porcelain
And curse sambucca’s name
Would always pose the question
Why the hell you played the game!

And yet with every wound re-opened
As you grimly reminisce it
Comes the most compelling feeling yet
God, you bloody miss it!

From the first time that you laced a boot
And tightened every stud
That virus known as ‘rugby’
Has been living in your blood

When you dreamt it; when you played it
All the rest took second fiddle
Now you’re standing on the sideline
But your heart’s still in the middle

And no matter where you travel
You can take it as expected
There will always be a breed of people
Hopelessly infected

If there’s a teammate, then you’ll find him
Like a gravitating force
With a common understanding
And a beer or three, of course

And as you stand there telling lies
Like it was yesterday old friend
You’ll know that if you had the chance
You’d do it all again

You see – that is the thing with rugby
It will always be the same
And that, I guarantee
Is why the hell you played the game!

England Captain Announcement

Today is the day the new England captain is announced. Following in the steps of Lewis Moody the pressure is on to get it right. Following such a woeful World Cup England and new interim head coach Lancaster are looking to right a few wrongs.

The captain will have a lot of pressure on his shoulders, even though realistically the choice could have been made through injuries. Not only that but because Lancaster is interim at present any new manager come May could decide a new captain at their own will.

So here is the big announcement the new captain will be Chris Robshaw.

The New England Captain

 

 

FACTFILE: CHRIS ROBSHAW

Name: Christopher Dennis Robshaw

Date of birth: June 4th, 1986

Place of birth: Redhill, Surrey

Height: 6 ft 2 in

Weight: 17st 9lb (112 kg)

Position: Flanker

Club: Harlequins

England senior caps: 1

The Harlequins man is the new man to lead the England pack to what is hoped to be a successful campaign. Robshaw has been forthcoming in stating a fortnight ago that he wanted the job and the honour of representing his country.

Robshaw, 25, will only officially be given the job for England’s next game, Saturday’s Calcutta Cup clash against Scotland at Murrayfield.

Only four times in history has England appointed a captain with less Test experience than the man chosen by new boss Stuart Lancaster.

England Head Coach Stuart Lancaster said: “We have a strong leadership group and I have been very impressed with the way they have all stepped up so far. Chris is a key member of that group and has shown with Harlequins and when I have worked with him in the Saxons that he can lead a team tactically and passionately. I am delighted that he has got this chance at the highest level and I know it will be a very proud moment for him, his club, family and friends when he leads England out at Murrayfield on Saturday.”